Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Godsend...

Websters dictionary defines a godsend as "a desirable needed thing or event that comes unexpectedly...as if from God." ("as if" LOL- there is no as if about it:) I experienced such an event last night firsthand.

I am blessed to have a particular group of friends that never cease to amaze me. I have, as of late, kind of shut everything and everyone out of my life....these friends included. I am a master wall builder, believe me. I have old walls that were started in my childhood, and new walls that have just begun to take shape. Walls that I have managed to knock to the ground, others that are partially broken, and a few that are as strong as a fortress that I fear may never come down. Very few people ever get to see behind those walls.

Last night, these amazing women in my life, staged an intervention of sorts. They did it because they love me. They did it to let me know in no uncertain terms that they love me unconditionally. They did it to point out just how much I have seperated myself from others and from God as of late. And to show me that I will never find the answers or the peace I so desperately seek by doing so.

Once you belong to God and you run from Him... He will chase you down. He will use the people He has put into your life and sprinkle in a godsend here and there. He is relentless in His pursuit and I LOVE that about Him. He will still love you even when you resist His efforts... in fact, He may love you just a bit more during those times.

Today I am thankful for these friends. Thankful that they love me without question or uncertainty. Thankful that they do not, nor would they ever, judge or condemn. Thankful that they care enough to step up and take over when things are out of control and my strength is gone. Thankful that they know me so well it's downright scary... despite my best efforts to keep them at arms length.

Two of my girls check on me pretty much daily without fail. Especially if they have not heard from me for awhile (or a couple hours:) This morning, one of them made a profound impact on me. From God's mouth to her ears to me via text. She changed everything. She said a lot of things that changed my perspective today, but this statement, very simple and concise and to the point spoke volumes to me. Even though I already knew.. it was sooo what I needed to hear. She said "honey...you have got to get back with God. His plans were laid out for you before you were born. He has the steering wheel."

I don't know what the future holds... but I know who holds the future. :)