44... yep i said 44. What a crazy number. I remember when I was little and my grandparents were in there upper 40's and early 50's. They were ancient. I don't feel ancient. I just feel tired. Lol
Everytime I look in the mirror, all these lines in my face are definately getting clearer. (wait...isn't that a song?:) I swear I've aged 5 years in the last 2, but such is life. At times it is a difficult thing to deal with. The body may age, but the mind really doesn't. Sure you get wiser with each passing year, and you have more life lessons under your belt, but at the core of it all I don't think the mind is at the same point in time as the chronological number. Mentally I still feel 17.
So the vanity side of me took a moment of self-pity for moving closer to the back side of 40 and to mourn the passing of another year, but then I reminded myself of people I know who never had the chance to make it to their 40's. And those I know in their 40's who are dying of cancer. And the 30 year old in my nursing home who has been there for ten years due to a motorcycle accident and is dependent on someone else for his every need. Then 44 sounds pretty darn good. In fact it sounds amazing. There but for the grace of God go I.
I don't know what 44 will bring for me. God willing I will be posting and invariably whining a year from now about turning 45. I've said it before but I will say it again... I don't know what the future holds...but I know who holds the future. And for that I am thankful.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Happy 8th Jaden!
Our last baby boy Jaden...aka J...aka JP...aka Jade...aka Shade...aka Shady...aka Shady Park...aka Jbone...turned 8 last week. Lol :) So we partied Thursday with the family, Friday with all the friends, and Saturday with the extended family. I think he would agree it was a successful birthday.
Ethan was 9 and Austin was 7 when Jaden was born. He was the only one of the four that was born during the day. Labor Day actually fell on the day he was born that year so most of the family was in Jasper for the weekend and were able to be there when he arrived. One of my most vivid and favorite memories of all time was when Ethan and Austin walked into the room and looked at him for the first time. Still chokes me up when I think about it.
I miscarried at 10 weeks a couple of months before I got pregnant with Jaden...so when his birthday rolls around I always think about that baby too. I watched that little one slowly slipping away over the course of three weeks as a once strong heartbeat began to weaken with the passing days until it finally was there no more. Even though I don't understand, I take comfort in a loving God who knows what He is doing. And I am so thankful that even though He had to take one baby away for whatever reason, He gave me another to love.... And love him I do. He is an amazing child.
Happy 8th big boy :)
Ethan was 9 and Austin was 7 when Jaden was born. He was the only one of the four that was born during the day. Labor Day actually fell on the day he was born that year so most of the family was in Jasper for the weekend and were able to be there when he arrived. One of my most vivid and favorite memories of all time was when Ethan and Austin walked into the room and looked at him for the first time. Still chokes me up when I think about it.
I miscarried at 10 weeks a couple of months before I got pregnant with Jaden...so when his birthday rolls around I always think about that baby too. I watched that little one slowly slipping away over the course of three weeks as a once strong heartbeat began to weaken with the passing days until it finally was there no more. Even though I don't understand, I take comfort in a loving God who knows what He is doing. And I am so thankful that even though He had to take one baby away for whatever reason, He gave me another to love.... And love him I do. He is an amazing child.
Happy 8th big boy :)
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